Saturday, September 19, 2015

What is Marriage Really?

rings, horse-drawn carriage, fantasy, heart, love
Something that has been coming up a lot lately in my life is marriage so I figure why not just write another post about it! One thing I have noticed a lot in my 20 years is that as the weather gets cooler, people do start to think about settling down or taking another step closer in their relationships. My guess is the holidays remind us of the importance of our loved ones, and it's too cold to really go out (I really don't like the cold XD).

legal, document, bindingLet's talk some marriage, shall we? My opinion on marriage as something that isn't for everyone still stands, but let's back up. The reasoning behind marriage has varied a lot throughout history: trading daughters for profit, marrying off daughters to build social standing, religious reasons, love, contractual arrangements. Even today there are many different reasons.

If we're completely honest, marriage is nothing more than a legal document. Because of that, marriage in the sense that we have come to know it needs to be recognized as a legal step more than anything else. In today's world, couples can live together as a cohesive family unit without the paperwork so it really isn't necessary to take that legal step unless it is something that you are wanting.

handcuffed, married, rings, locked in
Binding yourself to one person mentally, spiritually, emotionally, physically, and legally is definitely a big step, and it takes a lot of time to undo each piece of a bond like that. I'll let you all in on a secret: if I wasn't legally married to Roger, I probably would have left. But thanks to the amount of effort it would've taken to undo everything, I decided it was less effort to give us another chance. Being married literally saved my marriage because now, after all the growing and nonsense we've gone through together, our marriage is unshakable and worth more to me than anything else I could have on this Earth.

As I keep reiterating, we're all different. Legal marriage was one of those things that I always wanted out of life, but really it is just some paperwork and benefits you don't have to have. Maybe for you and your relationship, paperwork isn't what fits best. But maybe a legal union is all you want without some of the other aspects (spiritual, physical, etc.). Moral of this story, know what exactly it is that you're wanting and why so you can make an informed decision.
cohabitation, love, relationship

What is your opinion on getting the marriage license and whole shebang as opposed to someone with a common-law marriage? Or maybe just shacking up or someone married to disguise their sexuality?